TRUTH BE TOLD…I HALF-ASS MOST THINGS. Even the things I’m all in on I’m frequently only giving 2/3 of my ass.
So why do I do this? Because my 50% is better than most people’s 100%.
Did you just recoil? If so, you better keep reading.
I’m good at almost everything I do. I excel at anything I put my mind to.
Early on in life, I figured that all out, particularly the bit about my 50% being better than most everyone around me’s 100%. And after I figured that out, I stopped. I stopped trying to excel. I just gave 50-60% in almost everything for a while and got rewarded with all of the other above average kids.
AND NOBODY NOTICED. Well maybe my Mom noticed, but I was stubborn as hell and determined to do things my way.
But all in all, nobody pushed me to do better. Not family, not teachers.
And that got boring AF.
I was never really excited by the things I was doing and got bored so quickly with everything because I wasn’t challenged. And eventually, in school, I just stopped trying altogether. I was so over it.
I left high school early and went to University. That was a bit more challenging, but I was still bored. So, I packed up everything I owned and moved to New York City. I immediately landed a great job in media and climbed the corporate ladder. Corporate America was much of the same. I could do my jobs really well with minimal effort. I was being promoted and recruited left and right. And it was sooooooo B O R I N G.
So why am I telling you all of this…to toot my own horn and tell you how amazing and smart I am?
NO. Well, I AM…but that’s not why! LOL!
It’s because almost every high-level client that comes to work with me IS THE SAME. They have a similar story. They have lived most of their life half-assing it and having NOBODY notice.
So, what happens when you live your life that way?
Well, for one thing, it’s damn near impossible to find your purpose because you aren’t being pushed outside your comfort zone. You FORGET what it feels like to be genuinely excited or challenged by something. Life becomes MEDIOCRE. And it stays that way until we get so fed up with mediocre that we start searching.
Because that feeling of ‘there must be something MORE than this’ never goes away. It’s that feeling that makes us restless. No matter how deep we bury it, it’s still there nagging at us to SHOW THE FUCK UP AND BE WHO WE ARE MEANT TO BE. The inner struggle of wanting to continue to be complacent and half-ass everything and the voice deep down inside (our soul) is exhausting and beyond frustrating.
We get annoyed with ourselves and finally, when we have almost given up on everything we see a little light at the end of the tunnel. For most of us, it’s the first inklings of purpose dropping in, the hint of the possibility that life can be more than the mediocre pile of shit we have created with our complacency.
So, we get out of our own way and start to follow the light.
And it’s exciting, and it’s fun, and we finally WAKE up from our complacency coma and want to do and be better.
And we might do better and try harder for a bit, but here’s the problem.
WE HAVE BECOME LAZY AF. Like sloth level lazy.
We have no motivation.
We have no discipline.
We don’t even remember really what it feels like to excel.
We have lost the drive.
We can’t find the gas pedal.
We are literally LIVING IN CRUISE CONTROL.
I know because I face this almost every day. The soul directed desire to be driven and the equally as powerful soul-sucking laziness.
My drive and desire win out most days.
But it has taken a lot of calling myself on my bullshit and even more inner work.
It takes discipline.
It’s reminding myself, sometimes hourly, WHY I’m doing this.
It’s remembering how miserable the life of mediocrity was.
It’s not even close to easy. It’s the hardest thing I have done…battling myself.
But I am here to create an enormous impact on this planet. My purpose is to light a fire under the complacent asses of the people who are here to change the world.
BECAUSE THEY ARE ALL LIKE ME.
And if you have made it this far, and you want to throw up…it’s because they aren’t just like you…they ARE YOU.